MARIETTA, Ga. — Kati Gardner grew up the oldest of three siblings. There's her middle brother Collin and youngest brother Connor. The three lost their mother ten years ago, so the family has had to come together during the loss.
"She passed due to breast cancer, so in that situation, Connor definitely looked more toward me as the mom," Gardner said. “He’s definitely been more of like our baby, the person we just take care of. He was always the life of the party; he could get along with anyone and everyone. He's always the one bouncing around the room, talking to everyone and making sure everyone felt included."
Gardner described Connor as an avid Atlanta Braves fan who loved the outdoors. But in mid-February, Connor took a trip to Colorado and Wyoming. He and his girlfriend were in a car when they lost control and got into a fatal accident. And on Feb. 18, the cold, hard feeling of loss hit Gardner when she learned her brother had died.
“We didn’t get to see him again, and so the only thing we had left was getting him back," Gardner said. "You can’t have another holiday together. You don’t get to celebrate a birthday together.”
The U.S. Postal Service was the only way to ship Connor's remains back home. Gardner expected him back by Feb. 26 at the latest. She checked the mailbox every day. But the family held a celebration of life on March 3 without their loved one.
Connor finally came home the next day -- a day after the memorial service.
"This is not an Amazon package," Gardner said. "This is not a pair of shoes. It's literally a person's remains. He's not a package. He's a person. We're already dealing with a traumatic situation, and you're just making it worse. When I received him in the box, it was so jostled some of his remains spilled out of a sealed bag."
Gardner last tracked her brother at USPS's Palmetto Distribution Center, where she said he stayed for at least three days. It follows the long list of reported delays from the facility. A 2023 audit by the Inspector General revealed that USPS did not always comply with proper procedures for handling cremated remains. While human remains would be clearly marked most of the time, the handling of those remains was called into question by the report.
"Mail gets lost. I get it," Gardner said. "But if you’re paying priority, you’re shipping something of such high value that it’s insured and that was brought up to me multiple times. Well, if you’re insured, we’ll reimburse you. How do you reimburse someone’s life?”
Another audit done this year found there was a failure in relocating equipment to the Palmetto facility and confusion around staff roles and responsibilities, which contributed to the delays. USPS agreed to update its processes and have better communication when it comes to following proper procedures. USPS did not comment on prioritizing certain packages over others.
"It honestly takes the wind out of your wings because it's like you're looking forward to starting the healing process, and you can't," Gardner said. Because in your mind, you don't have that. You don't have him home. Task by task, day by day to just get through right now, and then hopefully over time we could start to wrap our head around it and think of the happy things that he passed with someone he cared for, he passed traveling, going on another adventure.”
Now that her brother is home, Kati Gardner can finally start to heal and bring a little more life back to her home.
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